This week's "Reflection" by Gary Keith, Pastor of Teaching & WorshipIn part one of this two-week series I talked about two ways we have "hit our thumbs." One of those ways talked about how our church is getting older and that part of our focus this year will be to reconnect with a generation that, for the most part, is missing from our church. That generation is the 23- to 38-year-olds. People in this age group can be either single or married and either have young children or have no children. We are still in the learning process of how to reconnect with this age group. As you think about this age group or are in this age group yourself let me ask you to respond to a couple of questions:
What are the needs that you know of for this age group?
What are the questions they are asking?
What are the unique challenges they are facing?
What needs to change to help make LBF an attractive place for this generation?
Let me know what you think. Use the blog link below.
My daughter is 35 and a single mother of a toddler. She is lost in the church because most people her age are couples. When she attended Moms 2 Moms it was basically married women. It is hard for her to relate to anyone because she is a minority. It seems that either women in this age group are single and have never been married or a married couple. It's not the churches fault, it's just reality. I think it might be a great outreach for a sort of "parents without partners" group or activity on a regular basis. It's painful when you are surrounded by intact families and you are alone with a young child. It is very difficult to get connected to a group. I sincerely hope that this will be helpful information.
ReplyDeleteI am a married 31 year old woman with 2 darling little girls ages 6 & 3 and a wonderful husband. So I fit right into this category! I have been attending LBF for almost a year and I absolutely love coming to service, in fact it's the only church experience that I have actually wanted to attend every week! The way the messages are given helps me to understand more about where I am in my relationship with God and where I would like to go with it. I really enjoy the worship aspect of service and appreciate the passionate feel of the way it is presented. I feel that people who are my age and in the same "young families" category are looking for connections with other people who can relate to the craziness and joy of this time in our lives. It seems that with work, all of the running around we do with our children, housework/yardwork, knowing how to handle brand new situations in child-rearing that we encounter so often, and trying to figure out where the husband/wife relationship fits into all of this really takes a toll on our lives. Maybe this could be an area where we create this "It takes a village" motto and actually come together as a group of people willing to create the "village" we need and support each other!
ReplyDeleteThey are either starting a family or thinking of the day they will. They are looking for a vibrant children's ministry. If they aren't looking for one if you provide one it will draw them. To me a vibrant Children's Ministry goes beyond programming. It is being intentional in the discipleship of children, getting parents involved with their children within the church, through which then in natural settings you can provide discipleship training for parents. It means getting the church as a whole more involved and focused on children and youth. It begins with how the nursery is run. The first year of life a child's main job is learning to trust. Is the nursery such that infants will build trust related to the Body of Christ? It builds from there. It doesn't come easy, but it happens.
ReplyDeleteFunny, Courtney, that you should say "it takes a village." Check out this month's LBF Scroll Newsletter (it mailed today) on page 3:
ReplyDelete"It was once believed that it takes a village to raise a child. LBF is a village."
I belong to this age group. I know how hard it is to fit the needs of this group. I have been searching other churches to see if they have anything, and nobody really puts much effort or emphasis here. I think that needs to change.
ReplyDeleteI know how difficult it can be. This is a group that always seems to be busy. Does anybody know when most of the people from this age group attend service? From working in the Children's Ministry, I assume during the 930 or 11 o'clock time frame.
Maybe planning a small group after that, at 1230? The 930 one didn't seem to work since most people "overslept" and missed it. I think one at 1230 or 1 would work better, maybe at the Starbuck's at the Colonies.
I would love to host a small group like that at my home, but based on current circumstances, that's just not possible.
Anyway, I'd love to see where this goes.
I was so happy last weekend when pastor Gary announced that the church is going to focus on the twenty and thirty something group at the church. My family and I have been attending LBF for almost a year and we have been wanting to join a home group but I felt we didn't really fit in anywhere. We don 't have much family and childcare is usually difficult to find,so family type groups are what I'd like to see more of. I would suggest having some type of "socials" or support groups for families. We have attended several events at the church but find it difficult to "meet" others. Everyone is usually busy running around with their own kids or socializing with others they already know. I often feel "alone" at many of the events even though there are several families present. It is hard to initiate a conversation with others because we are engaged with our kids. I am very excited about what is to come this year for the church. LBF is the first church my kids enjoy attending. And it is the only church where my husband and I actually feel we have gotten anything out of the messages. I can't wait to continue to grow in my relationship with God and to explore this relationship with the love and support of others at LBF.
ReplyDelete--My needs are finding opportunities to meet and really get to know other families with children. Attending events with the kids is not enough because it is difficult to "meet" other families when we are engaging in activities and chasing after our little ones.
--The challenges we face are fitting things into our busy schedule. Between school and extra-curricular activities, it is hard to squeeze more in. Another challenge is attending events at the church. We drive 30 minutes to get to service so attending other events at the church outside of Sundays are sometimes difficult.
--I'm not sure about what needs to change at LBF to attract more 20 and 30 somethings. I feel that we are too "new" to the church to really know or have opinions about what needs to change. But I think that so many people are looking for something more than "Sunday Service." Dances, socials, family events, support groups, phone lists, family olympics,Sunday events after service such as outdoor games, secret pals where you choose another family and leave them messages or riddles each week. I think what I'd like most is to "connect" with others at the church on a more intimate level. I am looking forward to seeing what 2009 brings for us! :)
I think God wanted me to see this email specifically because normally I hardly have the time to read them, but something told me to read this one. I'm in this age range, recently separated from my husband and have a seven year old who keeps me overwhelmingly busy. I would also like to see more people close to my age, but like one of the others said, it can be awkward being a single parent amongst mostly families.
ReplyDeleteSome of the needs I'm looking for are: groups of any sort that I can relate to such as: relationship help, single moms (don't know if you already have one) balancing work & motherhood with fun for me time too, game groups (?), possibly a hobbies group? Basically I would love to meet other single or married mom's or dad's close to my age that I can connect with in Christ.
Questions that I'm asking now are based on my current situation: How do I make time for myself and use the gifts God gave me? What should I do now that what I thought was God's plan looks like it wasn't? Investing for retirement, being the best mother I can for my child. Challenges we face are: career, finances, dating, marriage, divorce, sexuality, parenthood, in-laws & family, health, being happy in a selfish & unGodly world. Personally I think that if there were more groups targeted at this age group you'd see more participation. Child care would need to be available during these times as well. Maybe making up some kind of notice or flyers that could be distributed around Upland/Rancho.
I absolutely whole heartedly agree. This age group is dealing with amazing challenges. In a 5 year period, they may have gone from living with parents to becoming a wife/husband, children, mortgage, financial issues, job loss, or possibly divorce. Just one of those issues can be considered a life changing crisis. Add them all in and the life can be drained right out of you.
ReplyDeleteI lead a young women's bible study on Thursday mornings which provide childcare and my husband and I both are in the process of hosting another family bible study group which will meet once a month on Sunday's. Our women's study is strictly a study of God's word, a book at a time. Our family bible study is an opportunity for parents to witness to their children through worship and talking about God in an open and honest way.
What I have personally witnessed, is how God's word has transformed these women. It has changed their hearts and from the out flow of their hearts I have witnessed community that passes all social barriers. These women seem to have so little in common with each other but yet they have each loved on one another in a way that you won't find outside of God's unity. Caring for each, other babysitting for one another, serving each other and those around them. It has been the most amazing thing to witness. It started with God's word. They learned who He was, how He can be trusted and what all of this is really about. Some have moved on to more in depth studies that is provided through a ministry called BSF.
My vote is for less programs and more teaching and learning how to trust God's word. More witnessing and giving testimony and trusting the Holy Spirit to do what Jesus said he would do and has done.
Sometimes I feel we put more emphasis on programs than we do on God's word. I am always shocked at how little people know about scripture even though they have been going to church all their lives. There is power in His word and these young people who are experiencing these life changes would be better equipped if they could learn to trust the very word's our God made available to us. JL listed so many questions. All of these questions have come up in our studies. Because we are studying His word, we are receiving help with those answers. It is un-believeable how applicable His word is to us today, it never ceases to amaze me. We also learn that we can trust it, be soothed by it and receive strength by it to go on another day.
If we provide the platform, he can be trusted to do the rest. He will raise the people, the sitters, the time, the leaders, you name it. From the out flow of this, you will see the village/community and serving. You won't be able to stop it even if you tried. I have seen it in scripture and I have witnessed it in these studies. It is His work not ours, we are just the servants.
Wow. Such great comments. After Sunday's message my husband and I were talking about this topic on the way home. I go to the women's Bible study that Cindy was talking about and I was telling my husband that I wish he could go to the men's Bible study on Wednesday nights. I work late on Wednesday nights so it makes it impossible for him to go because he has our two young boys while I'm at work and financially we can't afford to have me take off early so he can go. He was telling me that even if he could go on Wednesdays, he doesn't feel like he really fits in with the men in that study because they seem to be a bit older and they wouldn't have as much in common as he would with guys his own age. I find that, as a couple, we have lots of friends in the age group just ahead of us but he hasn't had a lot of opportunity to connect with other guys his own age. Do we have a Bible study for guys in this age group? And if so, is there child care? If not, maybe this is a suggestion we could think about. Thanks for keeping our age group in your thoughts!
ReplyDeleteTL, there are a couple of other Men's Bible Studies. Both are morning studies 6:30 to 7:30 AM... so Im not sure if that works with your husband's schedule. I lead the Thursday Bible Study and a majority of the attenders are in their early 30's. We meet at Chick-Fil-A off Campus and the 210.
ReplyDeleteI was so happy to sit in church last Sunday and hear that there would be a small group that my husband and I would fit in. We are both 30 with a one year old and a new one on the way. We've been talking to Phil about a group and he's been telling us one is coming. Thank you so much making this a reality.
ReplyDeleteIt's very difficult to go through this stage of life. Single friends are no longer interested in doing anything, while other married friends are too busy with their own lives. Family is wonderful, but it would be nice to befriend couples our own age with similar family values. We can't wait to join!!!
I'm in my late twenties, no children, and single. I love attending LBF services, but that's about the extent of my participation. I don't feel like I'll have anything in common with women my age who are around my age who are married with children or unmarried with children. I would be surprised to see another other women out there who are in the same boat as I am- unmarried, single, and no children.
ReplyDelete